Sue Hodgson discusses some of the signs of menopause and how best to embrace these changes using your wardrobe...

The tests are back and the doctor breaks the news to you "Yes, it looks like you are menopausal" you may receive this news either as if from the grim reaper or as an exciting new adventure, depending on what you know and how you view it. But whatever your opinion on the matter, there are a few things that you can do to alleviate some of the symptoms that could well come your way.

The menopause seems to be one of the last taboos, one of the best kept secrets for women. Puberty, periods, childbirth, these are all things that everybody has a story to tell and there are numerous articles discussing the trials and tribulations of each stage, but the menopause appears to be a bit of a skeleton in the cupboard, everyone knows someone who has been through it, but what happens? "Well my Aunt Mary just used to get a little flushed, I suppose that was the menopause" you'll hear, but until you start to experience it, chances are that you will probably never have even thought about it.

So, without going into all the medical reasons why, the most common 'symptoms' are; hot flushes, night sweats and sleeplessness (usually around 2 or 3 am), muscle tone losing it's elasticity, dry skin, vaginal dryness, increased facial hair, and a fading of colour. Scary isn't it? Don't worry, not all of these things occur, in fact you may be one of the lucky ones who have none of these, but it's not all bad news. If you are able to come to terms with it, there are many compensations as well. More later.

Self image is another problem, and can have a profound affect. One starts to questions one's place in society, and family. With the inevitable loss of periods comes the realisation that the child bearing years are either coming to or at and end, and depending on your family situation can raise many thoughts. Your children could now be grown up and not needing you anymore, or maybe you have yet to have children and the chance of ever becoming a mother is disappearing. Your parents could be coming to the age where they are starting to depend on you now or maybe they pass away and you are now at the top of the mortality ladder. It can be a time for regrets, of reflecting on lost opportunities and loss of youth.

For many, our perception of ourselves is based on what we think is important, for example buying into the youth based culture of today, and this can rob us of our confidence, as our bodies are demanding to be listened to and are showing us that we can't compete with the tabloid babes any longer.

It is a time of reassessing who we are and what we want. A lot of strength can be gained from listening to other mid life women, for example Margie Walsh, who trained as a nurse and then a social worker and finally a teacher and at 53, turned around and said that she thinks she still has two or three careers left in her. Seeing the phase as a new jumping off ground to exciting new prospects without all the baggage that accompanied one on the earlier journey is a positive way of finding enthusiasm to live.

There are some practical steps you can take to make life a little easier at this time:

• Hot flushes (or flashes USA) can be the bane of many a mid life woman. The heat rising from your neck, burning your face and careering down your chest and back and the accompanying perspiration can be very unsettling.
  
  
• Avoid man made fibres like the plague. If you weren't feeling hot to start with, as soon as you cover yourself in a piece of synthetic material, however fine, you are gonna start dripping. Stick to natural fibres.
  
  
• Forget anything round the neck; polo necks or scarves, for some even heavy necklaces, these are detonators of heat.
  
  
• Layers are the answer to a 'maturing' ladies prayer, a thin vest top, preferably sleeveless (yes you will be the only one in straps in the middle of the coldest day in December, for fifteen minutes at least) and cover over with a shirt or cardi' or wrap of some kind.
  
  
• Avoid plain silk garments; as soon you start glowing you'll be wearing underarm patches, which will announce what is going on to the world.
  
  
• Remember to think that you actually need to be wearing two outfits, a summer one with a winter one over the top if its cold weather, because at some point, or many points during the day, it's going to be the height of summer for you!
  
  
• If you are someone who wears full face make up, it could be time to give it a miss, change the way you do it. For example there are many tinted moisturisers around, and when you get hot they won't streak in the same way as many foundations.
  
  
• Think about changing your hairstyle. This is a new you, if you have been holding on to your twenties hairstyle for years, maybe it's time to change and go for something more funky. Why not be outrageous, this is the time to take charge, although you are not a little girl anymore, you can still be the glamorous sex goddess, but it's not necessary to wear pigtails to achieve it.
  
  
• The sleeplessness can cause problems, least of which are dark rings under the eyes. A good concealer can work like magic, as can drinking plenty of water to rid the body of toxins.
  
  
• One more thing to bear in mind. As time moves on, one's pigmentations starts to fade a bit, you see it when old ladies still dye their hair black, and they look less than natural. If you are someone who has always worn black or grey, now could be the time to invest in some new colours. Chocolate brown is infinitely more flattering, works just as well as black and gives skin tone a bit of colour. Black tends to drain colour and emphasise flaws, which of course is not what you want to do. Hold that thought also when dyeing away the grey, don't automatically go for the same colour you always have.

And finally remember, this is the start of something new, this is your time, enjoy it, live it!

Article by Sue Hodgson